The Big Question: “Why?”

You must’ve a been in a place so dark, couldn’t feel the light

Reachin’ for you through that stormy cloud
Now here we are gathered in our little home town
This can’t be the way you meant to draw a crowd

[Chorus]
Oh why, that’s what I keep askin’
Was there anything I could have said or done
Oh I, had no clue you were masking a troubled soul, God only knows
What went wrong, and why you’d leave the stage in the middle of a song

Now in my mind I keep you frozen as a seventeen year old
Roundin’ third to score that winning run
You always played with passion no matter what the game
When you took the stage you shined just like the sun

[Chorus]

Yeah, yeah, yeah

Now the oak trees are swayin’ in the early autumn breeze
The golden sun is shining on my face
The tangled thoughts I hear a mockingbird sing
This old world really ain’t that bad a place

Oh why there’s no comprehending
And who am I to try to judge or explain
Oh, but I do have one burning question
Who told you life wasn’t worth the fight
They were wrong
They lied
And now you’re gone
And we cried

‘Cause It’s not like you, to walk away in the middle of a song

Your beautiful song

Your absolutely beautiful song         

-“Why” by Rascal Flatts, from their album Unstoppable

Such a sad, beautiful song. If you haven’t listened to it, you really should. This is a perfect example of what a suicide survivor can experience, emotionally and mentally when dealing with a suicide. Survivors are left with the unanswered questions, and the biggest of the lot: “Why?”

This question is used to help explain something we don’t understand. Humans seem to have a need to understand everything, or as much as we can. When that “why?” question isn’t answered, it can lead us distraught. For survivors, it can destroy us, if we let it.

This song represents the major ideas associated with suicide, and how one person can be affected by suicide. For some of us, a person lost to suicide can be a total shock and surprise to us—they were finding their feelings and pain so well we didn’t even now they were hurting. For others, we were aware the person was depressed or suicidal. But no matter how much information we knew/didn’t know, it hurts, a lot. I remember crying my heart out the first time I heard this song after one of my friends died by suicide, and as much as it hurt I couldn’t believe how much this song told the truth. We all question “why?” in our lives, and sometimes the toughest thing we can do as a survivor is stop questioning someone’s suicide. I’m not telling people this is the right thing to do—we all grieve differently, and there’s no set and stone way to deal with death, even with a suicide.

Rascal Flatts wrote this song because of their own experiences with suicide, and all of them are affected by it. As we all are. I’m an advocate, so I’m constantly keeping myself aware of what’s going on with those around me, and how the issue of suicide is being treated by the public. Every day I see the negative views associated with it, and it needs to end. For those who question what it may be like to lose someone to suicide, this song is the perfect example. I thank Rascal Flatts, and everyone associated with this song, for giving us all the idea of what it’s like to deal with a suicide loss. This is probably one of the most important songs that deals with suicide in our pop culture. Thank you.

“This old world really ain’t that bad a place” -Why